Mom and Boys

Figuring it out one day at a time.

Bizarrely Inappropriate

2 Comments

mama-bear

Today we all left the house for a much-needed break.

The kids and I tried to escape on our own and got about 3 houses down before getting stuck.

I’m so ashamed.

After getting back in the drive-way we called Isaac and admitted our defeat.

He had mercy on our locked-in, cabin-fevered selves, and picked us up for dinner.

God bless him.

We went to Chili’s and as we were eating a waitress (not ours) came up and commented on our adorable small child, Bo.

I don’t think this is weird, I make cute kids, so I thanked her and then she was on her way.

Later on in the meal Bo started crying and I had no choice but to feed him in the restaurant.

I don’t mind breast-feeding in public, but it is a little awkward.

But this waitress kept walking by our table looking for Bo.

Um, he is under my sweatshirt gnawing on my breast, do you mind not staring?

This happened once or twice and I just thought I may be imagining things because I am a little self-conscious about feedings in public.

But then, after Bo finished, she walked by again and said,

“I know this is really weird, but do you mind if I hold your baby?”

Um, yes, as a matter of a fact, I do.  First of all, I am eating.  I haven’t left the house in upwards of 48 hours, I finally have two hands to work with because I just finished feeding an infant, AND this is ice cream, so I would like to eat it now SO IT DOESN’T MELT.  Second, I don’t know you!  You could have the bubonic plague for all I know.  This is an infant, he is not even two months old, as much as you think I want your stranger, diseased hands all over my son, I DON’T.  Lastly, I STILL don’t know you, and you seem weird, because no one in their right state of mind would come up and ask a mother, who they don’t know, if they can hold their very tiny infant son.  See me women?  I am mama bear, this is my cub. Now back the F up before I get all gangster on your a**.

So obviously, what I actually said was,

“Sure, of course.”

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2 thoughts on “Bizarrely Inappropriate

  1. OH NO YOU DIDN’T!

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